Laundry Mountain
January 22, 2006
Sally Edwards is a nationally known standup up comedian and motivational humorist from the Chicago area. Her clean humor is ideal for parties, speaking engagements, conventions, church groups and trade shows. Sally can be reached by e-mailing sally@comedybysally.com
By Sally Edwards
©2006
I can’t remember Doctor. I can remember what my exact words were when I ran out of the house screaming. Something like, ‘I can’t take it anymore!’, or maybe it was, ‘Do it yourself!’ or “I’m outta here.�
“What prompted such a personal explosion?’ … “It was the size of the mountain. I could barely see over the top. I started to think I had no life. I started to think no one loved or cared about me anymore. I guess I just cracked.�
“What do you call this mountain?� … I looked up at the man in the white coat and noticed he motioned to the sullen guards who started to move closer. “I call it Laundry Mountain and I’m not going back.� To that he shouted, “Seize her! Seize her! Seize her!“ And that’s when I started to run but my legs wouldn’t move.
“So when did you wake up?�, my husband asked. “I guess when I got one leg free and started to fall.�
When you start dreaming about laundry, that is significant reason to give your husband the elbow and say, “Look. I think it’s time we went out.� Some days are better than others. There are the days when the domestic gene kicks in and you’re prompted to fold the laundry just as it comes out of the dryer. And then there are “the man in the white coat days� when you throw it in the basket and kick the basket in the direction of the door.
The day I went to Lauren‘s house (who I’d met in an adult sewing class), I felt I had secret comrades out there in the field. Encouraged to take a small house tour, I made a wrong turn and ended up in the laundry room. Before me, there was a landscape of crumbling dunes of dirty clothes. – each dune representing a color of the rainbow with the exception of the white dune that rose high above the others. As I stood stunned, Lauren came up and said matter-of-factly, “I should get to that.â€?
That’s it! “I should get to that!� Lauren became my hero that day. And often times, I think of her when I enter the laundry room as I start to feel the panic of falling behind. Although time has taken us our separate ways, I still have the image. I still have the dunes .
Rising from my chair after breakfast, my husband reminds me of my duties for the day. “Honey, are you going to get to the laundry today? I’m just about out of clean underwear.� And with no hint of panic, I think to myself, “I should get to that. I really should.�
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